Before every failed relationship, there is always the sign of it. But most often, we tend to ignore the warning signs because we keep believing that things will change. Before an egg will break, it usually starts with a crack. The crack is the sign that a breakage is on the way. Anything that will break your relationship or make your marriage toxic, the sign will always be there. It is our ignorance or deliberately ignoring these early warning signs that hurts us in the future. If you guys are not compatible, You will also see the signs. One day, a friend who has been in a toxic relationship for over two years called me to advise him on what to do. I told him, You don't need my advice because this is clear. If you are going to fight in your marriage, You will see the signs during the courtship. This my friend always fights with his supposed fiance. Yet they believe that it will be well. Love is not enough to have a successful relationship. You need wisdom too. I have heard this kind of his story many times, in many different packages. In the throws of love (or lust) we often ignore even the red flags being waved under our nose. That’s entirely human. Don’t be too quick to judge a new person in your life because we’re all creatures of unpredictability to a greater or lesser extent. But when these signs appear in clusters, or with some regularity, you need to wise up as to what you’re signing on for. What you see during courtship will be exactly what to expect during marriage. But the job of healing is not to beat up on yourself for not seeing them. It’s to face up to what they were, and why you let them go, so you’ll go into your next relationship with your eyes wide (or at least wider) open.
EARLY WARNING SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP.
5. Your partner fires up quickly and you’re unsure what triggered it.( The Problem of Anger).If there’s a legitimate reason or story for your partner’s anger that’s one thing and you might like (and need) to take the supportive role But if it blew in like a tornado, seemingly from nowhere, then take note. Be especially warned if YOU are the reason for it and you’re not sure why. In the early stages, we don’t have any perspective on our partner’s moods and emotions — and how quickly they can change. So we tend to cut them a break for it That’s a good thing because they’re probably doing the same for you. Anger management is very crucial in a relationship. Some have lost their lives due to uncontrolled anger. Wives have killed their husbands due to uncontrolled anger. Make sure that he is not a person given to anger. If he or she is, then the issues have to tackle or else, you are sitting on a time bomb. But the reason it can be difficult to identify these abrupt mood changes is that there are many of them and they can happen for very little reason. It doesn’t mean your partner is a bad person but if they struggle to control their emotions in the face of even 9 minor slights it can be very difficult to live with Especially when the target is you.
10. The conflict and arguments just keep popping up. Relationships that are defined by conflict, fighting, blaming and a lack of forgiveness spell disaster. Remember that it takes two people to argue, and another person’s unreasonable behavior is never any excuse for yours. If you are in this kind of relationship of constant arguments and conflicts, then you are in a toxic relationship. Let me tell you the truth.... Anybody you will marry should be able to agree with you 80% of the time. Constant disagreements and conflicts shows that you guys are not compatible. If you are not compatible, You won't enjoy your marriage. You can only endure it. Marriage is designed to be enjoyed, not endured. Constant Arguments are the easiest warning signs to a toxic relationship. Don't ignore it when its only on few occasions that you guys agree on. Let me say it again. If you cannot agree 80% of the time, then you not compatible. I didn't say you should agree 100% of the time I said 80%. Each time I see their call, I know they have started another fight... And they have been that way for more than 2 years. I know someone that every week, I have to answer a call from him or from the partner. I told the guy the truth that they are not compatible. But he wouldn't listen. But finally, they couldn't keep up with the fight, so they have ended a relationship of 4 years. 4 wasted years. And all the reason that it ended, was the same warning signs I saw from when the relationship was 1 month old. Thinking that love will help them out. Because of a truth, they loved each other. But Love is not enough. But they managed it till 4 years. This night, I am imparting you with wisdom. Wisdom to know what to do. It's so unfortunate that we can't finish it this night. I have almost like 10 more points to show you. So I will try and finish it up before weekend next week.